Signs of a Toxic Workplace in Tech
Here’s how to know it’s not just you…
Working in tech can feel like navigating a football field of landmines, all before your lunch break — if you even get one. Industry-wide layoffs have created widespread fear and distrust, causing many tech workers to wonder not only if they’ll have a job in a few months, but how different that job might look as AI adoption accelerates and replaces more humans.
A widespread culture of silence pervades the tech industry, where half of employees in a survey of 1,000 tech workers reveal that when they are faced with toxic workplace incidents in tech, they don’t do or say anything. And we get why. With jobs already in a precarious position, speaking up or out can put you on the chopping block next.
Many don’t even realize the problems they face every day are signs of a toxic workplace. Not Working in Tech is built on the belief that nobody should go to their job afraid, and that sometimes a drastic move, like taking paid leave, can be just what you need to zoom out and recognize the signs. Here’s what to look for.
✔ Unclear roles and responsibilities
Can you define your goals and expectations at work? What exactly does your manager expect from you day to day, week to week, and in the longer term? If these questions are hard to answer, or if you aren’t sure where your role stops and your coworker’s begins, you’re likely in a workplace reigned by uncertainty. This might seem like no big deal, but over time, it creates confusion, inefficiency and mistrust; it can also lead to performance management becoming a popularity contest driven by bias and prejudice, as whoever leadership likes best can be retrofit into “exceeding” their goals.
✔ Surprise negative feedback and/or retaliation for critical feedback
Negative feedback should never come as a surprise. Capable managers don’t leave you in the dark wondering how you’re doing, or if your progress is aligned with expectations. You and your manager should have regular 1:1 meetings, open feedback conversations, and informal catch ups that ensure you understand how you’re doing at work. It should never be a shock to learn that a Performance Improvement Plan (PIP) is coming your way.
In addition, in toxic workplaces it’s common to have candid feedback you share in confidence eventually be used against you, especially if it’s critical or negative about anyone in leadership. This is especially a risk if you’re from a historically excluded group talking to or about someone in the “in” group. In a toxic workplace, sharing legitimate critical feedback as a minority -- and especially as a woman in tech -- will often be used against you to establish you as a “problem” that needs to be “fixed”.
✔ Moving goalposts
In my own work as a manager at big tech companies, the most toxic environments shared one common sign. We were in a constant state of flux when it came to priorities and goals. Just when you thought you knew where your attention should lie, an “urgent” project would pop up and the tides would shift. We’ve all been there in tech -- pivoting at breakneck speed to a brand new product or feature right after we set quarterly KPIs, or went through yet another reorg. But this should be an outlier, rather than your standard operating procedure. A work culture of constant dramatic shifts and relentless whiplash is a sign of frenetic leadership acting on impulse rather than principle.
✔ Gaslighting
It’s a red flag in relationships and a red flag at your job. When you speak up about a problem, are you met with denial, doubt, personal attacks, or questions about your judgement? You know your reality, and you’re not making things up. Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse, and might look like:
Being called “too sensitive” after pointing out a microaggression or bias
Shifting blame to you when you question or correct a more favored employee
Saying you are “overreacting” about something that had a significant impact to you
Taking credit or burying your part in an accomplishment
Gaslighting is a form of bullying at work, and corporate tech companies get away with it because it protects the status of those in power.
✔ You feel isolated
Think back to recent icebreakers, offsites or team dinners - did these make you feel like a valued member of your team at work? Or did they reinforce relationships and statuses that put you on the outs? If you have no allies, colleagues, friends, or trusted managers to confide in, you might be a part of a toxic workplace where isolation is at best, the accidental norm, and at worst, a strategic tactic to alienate those who are seen as a “problem”.
In my first podcast episode, “The Crying Lunch,” I share how my colleague at Meta and I found ourselves finally letting out all the feelings of stress and isolation in a shared moment of deep emotional pain after working together for years. It shouldn’t have taken so long for us to realize we weren’t alone.
✔ You can’t disconnect without feeling guilty
Tech jobs are notorious for expecting constant connection — via phone, group chat, email, video call — at all hours of the day and night. This is unreasonable, and devalues the humans powering their companies. It’s also one of the key reasons tech workers have high burnout rates.
I was passed over for advancement or held back in my tech jobs because I set limits: I wanted to be able to put my young children to bed at 7pm, or to get a full night’s sleep myself instead of answering emergency calls to action from leadership. This type of toxic, “always-on” culture requires an inhumane level of control over workers’ lives, and has serious ramifications if you fall short.
Similarly, employees may find find they can’t shake a constant “bad” feeling about work, with anxieties and scenarios worrying their mind around the clock. If these are more constant, if every night feels like the “Sunday scaries” it might be time to step back and consider what’s not working in your company culture. That’s why I’m here – to show you how to improve your life in tech, or get out.
